Winning Friends and Influencing People Through Lifestyle Evangelism

Lifestyle evangelism is just a fancy way of saying showing the love of Jesus to people by doing life with them. Then taking it one step further and being able to draw on that relationship to witness and guide someone spiritually.

If you’re new here, I’m Tonya Johnson and I work alongside parents and youth leaders who are fighting hard to build a strong foundation for the next generation. I went to a ministry college meaning while I was getting my degree in secondary education I had the privilege to “intern” if you will for the largest baptist youth group in the country. I probably learned more in the field than I did inside of the classroom, and now I work in various programs and mentorships for at risk youth. My motto is that the world is fighting for the hearts of our youth, so we need to be fighting harder and my goal is to provide you with the tools to do just that.

In a nutshell, lifestyle evangelism is sharing the love of Christ with others through our every day interactions with people. So many christians only do life with each other. Who do we invite over for game night? The family from church that has it all together. Who do we have sunday lunch with? The family from church that has it all together. Who do we spend most of our time with. You guessed it, the family from church that has it all together. The salt can’t season the meat, if it never touches the meat. We can’t influence people for Jesus if we never interact with them. God has given us two resources, time and money, to use to reach people. Today we're going to talk about 4 examples of sharing Christ in your community, using those two resources, without pushing people away.

We do a lot of bbqs in the summer. Speaking from experience, everyone that knows my family for more than a minute knows we don’t drink. We know that most of our non church friends do drink. We don’t judge them for having different standards than us, but we do have boundaries set when it comes to not allowing alcohol into our home. Here’s what we’ve had happen on multiple occasions and I’m sharing this because if you make lifestyle evangelism a part of your life, you’ll probably run into this. What’s popular at bbqs for example? Beer. We’ve had friends say hey I know you don’t drink, but do you care if we bring a cooler. We politely explain our boundary of no alchool in our home and have never had an issue.

We host these a lot, finger foods, pizza, throw something in the crockpot. They don’t need to be fancy and your house doesn’t have to be spotless. Invite people over and love on them. Share some good food and some laughs. During game nights people let loose. Another warning, you may hear some language that you don’t use in your home. Here’s where the evangelism Side comes into play. How you act when you’re winning or losing, is a reflection of what a “christian acts like”. You may be the only “Jesus person” that this person has ever been around on a personal level. You not shaming or scolding them for their language while at the same time not partaking in it speaks volumes. Again, speaking from experience, only a few times of someone coming over to our home for game nights before their language magically cleans itself up because the other person is doing it out of respect vs out of us shaming them for speaking that way in the first place. Now they’re trusting us and believing that we care about them as a person not just care if they get saved or will come to church with us. Now yes, I’d love every person I know to get saved, but I’m in it for the long haul. Whether you choose to get saved or not or choose to go to church or not or choose to fill in the blank doesn’t affect how I treat you and your family.

By the way, this is what we should do for everyone, not just a lost person. So if you’re watching this and you’re like wait, you’ve done this for me before, do you think I’m not doing good spiritually? Not at all, this applies to all of our relationship, but it speaks volumes to those who don’t know Jesus or who know him but aren’t living their life by His principles and we’re going out of our way to treat them with kindness instead of judging them.
-pick their kids up from school
-mow their yard
-fix them a meal
-clean their house
-adopt them for christmas
-tutor their child
-anything you can do to fill a need

Anyone can do this. The easiest way is pick a devotional and go through it together. You can do this with just women or just men or you can do family style. Get creative. Invite 3-4 people/families and get started. Sometimes people will come to a bible study in your home that would never go to a bible study at a church. They’ve already been there and it feels familiar. People sometimes associate churches with judgmental people, and no one wants to be judged. Not only can you help them grow spiritually and ultimately lead them to christ this way, but you can become the bridge between them and the church. Start off inviting them to fun activities or social gatherings then invite them to big days and then finally to more intimate settings like Sunday school or bible study.

It’s easy to get excited and start booking out every weekend and having people in your own multiple times a week. I’d recommend starting with two nights per month and going from there. I’ve included a free calendar pack for you as a fun and cute way to make sure you’re not spreading yourself too thin. Stick this on your fridge or in the front of your planner and keep a visual check no how much you have going on each week before inviting that new family you met at the park over for coffee. You’ll have seasons where you can do more and seasons where your family life takes over. Thats ok. Enjoy each new season and make the most of the lives God brings across your path to impact. 

I know, the ultimate agenda is bringing them to christ, but when I say don’t have an agenda I’m meaning don’t stop being their friend when 1 of two things happen. 1. They end up never wanting anything to do with God. You don’t know how long this phase will last, and writing them off because they don’t fit into your little box will only further reinforce the narrative that they already have which is “church people” are only nice to you when they are trying to convert you. Our job is to show the love of Jesus, His job is to convert them. You do your job and let Him worry about His. 2. They do star coming to church. You say Tonya, why would I stop talking to them when they start developing a relationship with Jesus. Because you viewed them as a project more than a friend. You “fixed” them, and now you’re ready to move onto your next project. Wrong! You’re creating lifetime relationships, not checking people off of your to do list.

Jesus didn’t call us to minister to others while our own lives go to crap. Keep your personal devotions a priority. Fill your own cup first so you can pour into others, and keep your main job, your kids and your spouse, front and center. Lifestyle evangelism isn’t a sprint, it’s a marathon. The only way to stay in it for the long haul is to not burn out.

I hope this helped! This is Tonya Johnson signing off with Helping Hearts Homeschool where I help parents and youth leaders fight for the hearts of the next generation. See ya next week!